Why A Spencer Is Better Than An Oreck

When it comes to cleaning the kitchen floor, NOTHING works better than a Spencer. I’ve had many different floor cleaners, and I realize Oreck is a good brand, but come on, let’s get real here. It doesn’t hold a candle to a Spencer. Why do I say that? Well, I will enumerate.

1. Suction Power: A Spencer leaves no crumb unvacuumed. Where an Oreck might miss the crumbs in the corners and under my feet while I’m cooking, I can always count on my Spencer to find every single one – whether I’m standing on it or not.

2. Removal of waste: A Spencer has a self-emptying bag. An Oreck must be emptied periodically to keep it from becoming gorged with floor-gunk, whereas my Spencer empties itself, without my help. But then . . . I do have to remember where it empties, and avoid that area until its contents have solidified.

3. Thoroughness: An Oreck just vacuums up the debris. My Spencer not only sucks up every single crumb in sight, but it also licks up any little grease spots in the process. When my Spencer is finished, the floor looks like it’s been mopped! Just try to get an Oreck to do that!!

4. Storage: After using an Oreck, it must be put away in the closet. A Spencer puts itself away!

5. Trip hazard: The electrical cord on an Oreck is long and one must be careful not to trip over it. A Spencer is self-propelled. No cords to worry about – but there may be just the slightest danger of getting rear-ended.

6. Cost: An Oreck is expensive. A Spencer works for Kibbles. And Bits. But mostly Kibbles.

7. Ease of operation: I have to push the Oreck around in front of me and direct it toward the item I want picked up. It can be tiring and slow. A Spencer not only is self-propelled (see item #5), but is also extremely fast. My Spencer is fine-tuned to sense where the crumbs and bits of food are about to fall, and can dart in almost before they hit the floor. A couple of times I’m sure they were caught in mid-air.

8. Motivation: An Oreck just sits there, waiting for me to force it into action. My Spencer is ready to work as soon as I get up in the morning, and leads me to the kitchen.

9. Multi-Use Function: An Oreck only cleans floors. My Spencer can find crumbs and remove them instantly from floors, beds, couches, shirts, and bathrobes, and can even clean any stray food particles from between my fingers. It would work just as well on faces if I’d allow that, but that’s what napkins are for. My Spencer is a floor-cleaner, face-washer, foot-warmer, lap-quilt, intruder-alert, guest-greeter, deer-stalker, and best buddy. Now I ask you, can an Oreck do all that?

10. And finally, unlike a Spencer, an Oreck has no personality.  I rest my case.

David Oreck’s got nuthin’ on me!

This was written in response to this week’s WordPress writing challenge, and naturally, I neglected to provide a link to that so you could go see what others are writing. OOPS!! Anyway…hope you enjoy my top-ten list.